Of Anna
by that-girl-over-there
Summary: Mostly canon drabbles, in no particular order, revolving around Anna. And Mr Bates, of course. Enjoy!
1. Envy

Takes place during Daisy and William's wedding.

A/N: just something I considered while watching tonight's episode.

Disclaimer: I do not own Downton Abbey or its characters.

**Envy**

Despite that day, that supposed day of joy, as it was, Anna couldn't help but feel a twinge of jealousy in her gut. How heinously unjust the rules of propriety were to her. How fate seemed to mock her. Here Daisy was marrying William, a man she didn't love - didn't even fancy - and nearly everyone knew it to be a lie. Yet, she herself couldn't even properly court her beau whom she'd completely loved for years.

John shifted his weight next to her, and she wondered if he felt similarly. The way his fingers brushed against hers confessed . . . he did.


	2. Grace

**Grace**

Anna bravely took it upon herself to escort Vera out, saving Bates from whatever final toxic words his wife may have for him. Vera pushed out the servant's entrance, and fastened her gloves. "Idiot girl," she sneered at the younger woman standing in the doorway. "You'll never have him."

"I already do," Anna replied boldly, her confidence regaining for the first time since she learned of the woman's return.

Vera's eyes widened at her brazen statement. "I'm his-"

But Anna wouldn't hear of it. "You have his name," she declared. "Nothing more." Then stepped back and promptly shut the door.


	3. Words

A/N: Was anyone else disappointed to see Anna had no family to support her at the trial?

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><p><strong>Words<strong>

_Married_

_Drunkard_

_Secret_

_Prison_

_Thief_

_Murder  
><em>

_Trial_

_Mistake_

_Pursued _

_Shame_

The words were scribed with such fury. The wrath only an angered mother could muster. Because Anna had always been vague when writing home about John, she'd expected such a letter when the news of the scandal finally reached the backwoods acreage that held the Smith family farm.

Despite anticipating this backlash, it still cut deep.

But what had driven her body to heave with sobs was a word she never expected from her mother, certainly not when she needed her most. Six letters forever etched into her heart:

_d i s o w n_


	4. Admission

**Admission**

In the courtyard they sit at a respectable distance, as they often do at the end of the day, silently peering into the darkness. Talk of war, honor, death and soldiers consumes the daytime, but not now.

"I love you, Anna Smith." The declaration is barely a whisper, but it fills her heart as if he'd shouted it from every rooftop.

"I know. Just been waiting for _you_ to discern it."

"I can't give you-"

"I'm not asking for anything."

More silence. Her hand slips into his.

"Right now, all I require is your love."

"Then you shall have it."


	5. Prayer

**Prayer**

Anna Bates had been meaning to pray, for John, for the truth, for some miracle to overturn the ruling. But her mind had wandered.

Why had this happened? After all they'd endured together, did their love really need to be tested, yet again?

But was it test, she considered darkly, or something far worse. A punishment for her sins, perhaps? For coveting a married man. Pursuing a married man. Flirting, holding hands with and kissing a married man. Was this her price to pay for seducing a man who had pledged his life, in front of God, to another?

Anna swallowed her sobs and straightened her spine as she knelt beside her bed. Her clasped hands gripped tighter.

"Heavenly Father," she began, "I'll not repent..."

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><p>AN: teeny bit longer than a drabble. oops.


	6. Reunion

**Reunion**

She didn't feel the gravel beneath her feet give way as she launched herself from her post or the wind on her face as she raced forward. She didn't hear the crush of the rocks, the gasp of Mrs Hughes or the 'hmph' of Carson.

She only felt the solid frame of the man she collided into, the strong arms enveloping her. She only heard his whispers of adoration and promise in her ear.

He didn't hear the clearing of numerous throats, or the thundering clouds above. He only heard her cries of rejoice as his wife welcomed him home.


	7. Home

_{Follows_**_ Reunion_**_}_

**Home**

"Come along now," Anna teased, practically dragging him down the dirt road, causing him to chuckle.

Bates considered asking again why she'd led him out from Downton near dusk, but knew she'd only reply as she already had: "It's a surprise."

Finally, they rounded a large lilac bush and paused. In the distance, he could make out a small brick house.

"They've not finished restoration yet," she whispered. "But it's ours."

Squeezing her hand, he marveled at the modest dwelling. He didn't care if it had dirt floors, held together by twigs and mud or was haunted.

It was theirs.

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><p><em>AN: Thank you all for the wonderful reviews and alerts. I greatly appreciate them._


	8. Matrimony

****_A/N: Happy Valentine's, friends. :)_

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><p><strong>Matrimony<strong>

"We're married!" Anna exclaimed for the nth time since leaving the Registrar Office moments earlier.

"We are," Bates agreed again, squeezing her hand upon his arm.

"I still can't believe it's finally happened," she sighed. "I fear I'm still in my bed and this is but a dream."

His eyes twinkled. "Then let's pray to never awake."

"Aye, let's," Anna smiled, then kissed him soundly in the middle of the street.

Caught off guard, his cheeks pinked with blush.

"Sorry," she giggled.

"Never be sorry for that," he said with a wolfish grin, adding, "My Love."

Marking Anna's turn to blush.


	9. Touch

**Touch**

Their first meeting after his arrest was trying. When at last John presented himself, in his bleak prison issued blues, Anna sighed a breath she hadn't known she was holding.

Immediately, she moved to embrace him, her husband, but he shirked away. He wasn't agile enough, certainly not without his stick. And the moment she gripped his shoulders, his eyes widened in apology.

"No touching!" the guard sternly bellowed.

A squeak escaped her as she recoiled. Her eyes misted with tears, her hand moved to her quivering lips.

How could it be John was suddenly more unreachable than ever before?

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><p><em>AN: I'll be AFK for nearly a week and unable to upload. Fret not! I shall return with more drabbly goodness_. ^^


	10. Desire

**Desire**

"Anna, no."

Bates took no pleasure in drawing away from her embrace, from her warm lips and wandering hands.

"Just . . . a moment more," she breathed, pushing closer.

She claimed his mouth again, completely. Consumed by passion, she pressed flush against him. Sensing blatant evidence of her workings on him only fueled her more, provoking a purr in her throat.

What had he gotten himself into? His heart raced while his head swam. The threat and repercussions of being caught weighed less and less with each touch. He was hopeless.

Lord, she was surely going to be the death of him.

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><p><em>AN: Sorry it took me so long to reply to your thoughtful reviews_. :)


	11. Disparity

**Disparity**

Had John ever loved Vera, he didn't know. He'd been attracted to her, yes, as any moth is to a hellish inferno. But if she'd ever held a place in his heart, it was easily dwarfed by Anna.

There was no end to the ways the two women differed. Where Vera's venom had always made him grateful for his sharp tongue, Anna tested his vocabulary's ability to voice his adoration. Where once Vera made him glad to be a large man, able to endure her many physical abuses, Anna made him thankful for his stick when her smile made him weaken at the knees.


	12. Fear

**Fear**

"Anna, I cannot remain at Downton."

_'What?'_

"I must return to Vera."

_'No!'_

"I should honor my vows to her."

_'You can't!'_

"Forget me."

_'Never!'_

"Find someone who-"

Anna bolted upright from bed gasping for air, her face and hair wet from tears and sweat. Upon catching her breath, she went through the usual mantra of reassurance. It was just a dream . . . John had returned to her . . . He wouldn't leave her . . . Ever again . . . He had promised. Once calm, she returned to her pillow, but it was utterly useless. Sleep evaded her again.

How long would these nightmares continue to plague her?


	13. Claim

_A/N: this was too fun, but impossible to compress into a drabble._

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><p><strong>Claim<strong>

They stood the farthest back, yet closest together. Bates felt like a disheveled mess next to the angel beside him. Seeing her out of uniform was a treasured gift. His face remained stoic as he stole sideways glances her way every few minutes, committing each precious image to memory. Like everyone else, she was freshly woken from bed, waiting for O'Brien to return from fetching Lord and Lady Grantham. Despite the drafty hallway, her sweater hung curiously loose on her shoulders, privledging him to drink in her neck and collarbone. His disciplined eyes broke from her and swept back over the crowd before them. Everyone appeared to be listening to Mrs Patmore as she consoled Daisy. Everyone except Mr Molesley, who, telegram in hand, was gazing back at . . . Anna.

Bates knew in his absence Molesley had expressed interest in courting her. When she had teasingly told Bates of this, his alarmed reaction had amused her to say the least. While he could not fault the man - or any man who might seek her - he had since developed a keen annoyance for the other valet.

Nonchalantly, Bates shifted just slightly in front of Anna, but clearly in Molesley's field of vision. He watched as the man's eyes moved from Anna, and smiled inwardly when they reached his own. Calm, collected, he merely stared at the man.

_One_

_Two_

_Thr-_

Molesley's eyes widened in panic before darting about the room, desperately searching for anything that wasn't the man whose girl he was just caught admiring. At last, he settled on Mrs Patmore.

Bates felt a stern nudge into his ribs and glanced down to see Anna. Well aware of the claim he'd just made on her, she rolled her eyes with a smile.

Mrs Hughes, who'd bared witness to the whole event, nearly chuckled aloud, but managed to cover it with a cough. Carson raised an eyebrow, but she simply shook her head.

Even in times as dire as these, she mused, the ways of men and love remained the same.


	14. Forgiveness

**Forgiveness**

"I'm sorry."

When O'Brien had taken her aside, this was the last thing Anna had expected. Her face betrayed her shock as her eyes widened and brows shot up.

"I don't know what to say," Anna answered honestly.

"Mr Bates and I aren't pals. Far from it. But I wouldn't wish this on him, or you," the Lady's Maid shifted uncomfortably. "And when they had me testify..."

"S'alright," Anna sighed. "John forgives you. And Mrs Hughes. And His Lordship. He's asked me to do the same."

A pause passed between them.

Anna glanced off to the side. "I'm still working on it."

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><p><em>AN: AFK again for a bit _):


	15. Ring

**Ring**

Was it real? Had she fabricated the whole experience in her head?

Anna had dreamed about her wedding since she was a child. But her fantasies, even the extravagant ones, didn't compare in the least to the afternoon, and evening, of Friday.

Despite the grimness about the house, she was finding it difficult - no, impossible - to suppress her smiles.

Anna's fingers brushed across her waist, where the ring she'd received the day before rested in the tiny pocket sewn in the inside of her dress. She traced the circle with her index finger. Another smile broke through.

It was real.

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><p><em>AN: Back! Thank you all for your reviews and alerts - they warm my heart. :)  
><em>


	16. Sins

**Sins**

"With Bates," Mary began tentatively one evening while Anna finished her hair. "Did you know about prison? Having a wife? ...When you fell for him?"

"Not at first, no. But by the time I did, I loved him enough that none of it mattered." Anna fixed the final hairpin.

"Didn't it?" Mary sounded doubtful.

"I knew he wasn't that man any longer." Anna answered, wisely adding: "No more than you are the woman you used to be."

"You've a forgiving soul, Anna."

"I saw past John's mistakes. Just as I believe Mr Crawley will do the same for you, M'Lady."


	17. Premonition

**Premonition**

Bates believes in crystal balls. He's compelled to. He's peering into one right this very moment. And it beholds the most delightful image he's ever seen.

Anna sits at the servants' table, holding Ethel's son. She bounces the baby boy on her knee as he giggles, causing her eyes to light up in ways Bates has never witnessed.

He is deaf, at the moment, to the former maid's troubles. Deaf, really, to the world that exists beyond his Love and the boy.

Anna catches his eye just so, a beautiful smile gracing her lips, and he knows. Oh, he knows. He will gift her with as many children as she wishes.


	18. Villain

**Villain**

"Behold his grace, Johnny Bates," Vera drunkenly seethed. "His facade of honor and bravado veils a cowardly cripple of a man. If you could call him that.

You're a clever git, I'll admit as much. Bewitching that pretty little thing.

Tell me, Johnny, real you, has she seen it? Has your precious Anna? She daren't, surely, or you'd lose your tart.

If she knew. Oh, if only she knew of your creature that lurks in the bottle. She'd toss you out like yesterday's slop!

But not I. We're the same, Johnny. The devil in you is the devil in me."


	19. Smoke

**Smoke**

The smooth taste flowing over his tongue and into his lungs. The beautiful tendrils dancing upwards. The feel of the cigarette in his otherwise idle hand. John enjoyed smoking. He'd picked it up while in Africa. But dropped it during his time in prison.

Then he came to Downton.

However much he disliked Thomas and O'Brien, he found the smokey scent about them welcoming. He couldn't resist.

"You smoke, Mr Bates?" Anna asked, settling in her chair.

He glanced from her to the smoldering paper roll in his hand. "An old habit, I'm afraid."

She didn't say anything in return, but her nose wrinkled in distaste.

John never smoked again.

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><p><em>AN: A HUGE thank you to all who've reviewed. I've been crazy busy lately, but I hope these next few chapters make up for my absence. _:)


	20. Curse

**Curse**

John shifted on his cot and glared at the ceiling of his cell. He'd been residing in the dank prison for nearly four months now. If ever he had time to think, it was now.

Who else would occupy his thoughts?

She had been determined enough to visit him every week and in that time she hadn't mentioned anything. It seemed nothing had come of their wedding night, and for that he was thankful.

After everything he'd put her through, he was relieved he hadn't burdened her with the curse of baring and raising the child of a soon-to-be-hung murderer.


	21. Blessing

_{precedes **Curse**}**  
><strong>_

**Blessing**

When she had missed her monthly she'd been terrified. Then delighted. So delighted she'd made an appointment immediately.

Doctor Clarkson's medical explanation buzzed in her ears, but the words were muffled. Something about false and stress and diet and hormones.

She nodded, saying she understood and made her way back.

Once home, she slid back against the closed door of her room and strangled a sob in her throat. Silent tears trailed down her face. Her hand smoothed over her empty abdomen.

After everything she'd endured, why couldn't God see fit to at least grant her this one blessing?


	22. Wisdom

**Wisdom**

The spring night air was unseasonably cool. The courtyard deserted.

Bates rubbed her arms as he held her against his chest. "I don't deserve you," he whispered into her hair.

Anna made an annoyed sound into his coat. She pushed back and looked into his eyes. "Do you truly believe that?"

He let out a small breath, not quite a sigh. "I do."

He expected her to frown and protest, but instead she slid her hands underneath his coat and grasped his shoulders. With a smirk, she said, "Then it would be wise of you to never let me go."


	23. Mission

**Mission**

"She has gone mad!" Mary ranted.

"You should've had him sacked when you had the chance!" Edith called from the driver's seat.

Anna ignored Edith and addressed Mary. "M'Lady, you must calm down. Lady Sybil, she's in love-"

Mary's eyes widened.

"Or, at least she thinks she is," Anna quickly amended. "My point is, you must make it clear you're on her side, but that running off is not the way to go about this."

Anna couldn't help but feel a bit like a hypocrite. How many times had she dreamed about running away with Mr Bates?

Mary sighed. "You're right, Anna. I must try to keep a cool head."


	24. Warning

**Warning**

"Ah, Anna, come in. There's something I wish to discuss with you."

"What is it, Mrs Hughes?"

"Have a seat."

She did.

"It's come to my attention that you and Mr Bates have become good friends?"

"I'd say that's true of all of us."

"I think you know what I mean."

"I'm afraid I don't." She blinked.

The Housekeeper frowned.

"Mrs Hughes, Mr Bates is a decent man of good character. Or wouldn't you agree?"

"I would."

"Then why shouldn't I be friends with him?"

Mrs Hughes sighed. "You're right, Anna. I apologize if I judged your friendship wrongly."

Anna stood to leave.

"Just . . . be careful, girl."


	25. Cry

**Cry**

John Bates had faced unparalleled dangers in war, defended himself against frightful monsters in prison, but never once felt scared. Not truly. Not even when he learned of his chance of hanging in the gallows.

How quickly that changed.

The silence of the courtroom was pierced with her cry. It hit him like a tidal wave that chilled him to the bone. His heart froze in his chest, constricting his lungs.

Logically, he had known what the future held for him, for them. But it wasn't until that moment that it became real. Too real.

The guards were pulling him away now. Her pleads fell on the deaf ears of justice. He called out to her. Desperately he wanted to reassure her. To tell her he loved her, had always loved her, always would. And he wanted to beg her forgiveness for every tear she'd ever shed for him.

But nothing came out. His breath was naught. His lungs empty and as useless as his wretched leg.

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><p><em>AN: Thank you, readers, for your reviews and alerts. I appreciate every single one. Sorry I haven't updated in ages... I've been away and I seem to have lost my tiny plot bunny._ :(


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